I finally found out why I feel the way I do. I went to see the rheumat0logist yesterday afternoon and she said after looking at all the tests that came back and asking me my symptoms she feels that I have rheumatoid arthritis. I had really mixed feelings when she told me. I know there are some really good treatments and medications for rheumatoid but I also know what a crippling disease it can be. I felt like I could cry and felt so relieved at the same time that maybe someone was going to help me.

I have thought about the symptoms and think they started about 4 years ago. The symptoms started in my feet and at first I went to a foot doctor who diagnosed it as plantar faciitis. He gave me injections into the bottom of my feet that were the most painful shot I've ever gotten...the blood was dripping on the floor as he was giving the shot. Anyway, then my toes seemed to be the worst and they were burning so badly. Then, with that new bit of symptoms my family doctor said it was neuropathy. I have been treating them for neuropahty and it helps some but it just didn't fit why my knees were starting to hurt and my hands were hurting. It's gotten so I can't even open a jar. So, with a diagnosis that made sense and fit the symptoms I felt good that I was going to get some help...felt sad that I had to deal with another illness. I have been pretty depressed today...I feel so hopeless. I am just hoping that it's a process I will have to go through to accept this.

How to win over and make your in-laws like you:) Eric's father is visiting Eric & Kristi & Jacob this weekend. Jacob talks to me a lot of the phone and he has recently gotten birthday gifts in the mail from Grandma Becky and Grandpa Wayne. I guess he likes my name or doesn't even associate it with me...anyway, Jacob is calling Grandpa John by the name of......you guessed it!!....Grandma Becky. I hope John doesn't get upset about it. It's just a little guy trying to figure out this big wide world!!