Kelly, thank you so much for the acronym on fear. I'm going to print that out and keep it somewhere that I can see it frequently. I have a lot of fear I deal with...not just fear about the foot pain so it think can benefit me in many areas of fear in my life:)

We got no help at all from the foot doctor. He told me he is an orthopedic foot doctor and what I need is a neurologist who deals with nerve pain. So, I called the neurologist and will go see him at the end of March. The last time I saw him he made me mad but I will give him another chance. At the end of my last appointment he told me I was on a lot of medication. Well, like I didn't know that all ready. When we got to the car I went over the list of meds with Wayne.

There's meds for thyroiditis...gotta take that
there's meds for my foot pain (3 pills)...gotta take that
there's meds for high blood pressure...gotta take that, don't want a stroke
there's pills for back pain, really need those ...that's 2 pills
there's a pill for high blood sugar, really need that
and last but not least are pills for laxatives...anyone with a pain pump like me needs those

Now, why didn't the doctor go over the list like that with me instead of making me feel like I'd done something wrong? I think if he brings it up again I will ask him what he suggests I cut out of the list? Other than this one incident I have really liked him so maybe he will give me some help with my feet...I always continue to hope!

Yesterday (Friday) was a rough day for me physically and mentally. I can usually keep my spirits up and don't get depressed very often. The foot pain yesterday was just almost unbearable. When I went to the foot doctor one of the questions they asked me is if the pain ever gets bad enough that I want to cut my foot off? I thought that was a rather odd question for a doctor's office to ask me until yesterday...then I understood. I was ready to cut off my toes the pain was so bad.

I take quite a few pills (unfortunately) in the mornings and to guard against stomach upset I usually take the pain pills first. I take 3 different kinds of pills for my feet and when I first wake up I take those and the pain pill for my back. I don't take much for my back since getting the morphine pump installed...thank goodness! Sometimes in the mornings I'm so sleepy when I take those pills for my feet that I can barely focus my eyes. The pain was so bad yesterday that I was really depressed about my situation.

Around 4:00-4:30 in the afternoon I was going to take the rest of my morning pills and what to my amazement was one of the foot pills I forgot to take. That certain pill is called Tegretol and is actually an anti-seizure medication but they have found the the anti-seizure medications help with nerve pain. I would imagine that not only did my feet hurt from not getting the tegretol but I think I went through some withdrawal from not getting the Tegretol...it is a very strong medication!

It makes me so thankful for these pills that keep the pain under control most of the time. I cannot imagine my life without them:)