This is the smile Jacob give for every picture taken. It was so comical. I had to try to get him when he wasn't aware of the camera. His Mom, our daughter Kristi, remembered that when she was about his age (actually I think she was 5, not 3) that her smile was like this but maybe a little worse..her mouth was wide open. I was trying to get a picture for Christmas cards so I made her go into the bathroom and practice smiling in front of the mirror for a while. I apologizd to her and she said I didn't have to apologize because she remembers that it worked for her!

Isabella Amira on Sunday, December 16th ...what a little cutie!!

Kristi and Jacob heading to church on a very snowy morning. I think the pine tree across the street is so pretty with all the snow on it. It looks like a winter wonderland!

Left to right is Jacob, Kael and Rhebeca. They look cold but they had a good time sledding. Remember the story about getting the hand, scarf and gloves from The Gap and how bad my back was hurting? Well, if you'll look at Kael in the middle..he is wearing the set out in the cold and snowy weather. I'm so glad I made it there to get the set for him. He loved it!

One of the scrapbook sites that I visit asked people who blog to answer this question......You can go back to your childhood for one day. What day and age will you choose?

After a lot of thought I would go back to my early teens when I was showing horses. That was a really fun time for me. I remember going to church and changing my clothes ont he way home so we chould head off to the horse show. This was also a time when my friends and I would ride our horses to each others houses and have fun with them. We would try circus acts or just tie up the horses and talk to each other.

Right now I suffer with chronic pain so this was a time when pain wasn't a part of my life. I hadn't had any surgery yet and so it was a very innocent time of my life without the experience of anything "bad" that comes with living life:)

This is my consolation picture. We had scheduled this group plus Isabella to have their picture taken at Olan Mills on Friday evening. When we got there they told us it would be at least 1/2 hour wait. Children this age do not wait well...so we cancelled the picture. I really felt bad because Jacob isn't here that much and I want a picture of all our grandchildren. So, I took this one on Sunday but couldn't get Isabella in the picture because she was sleeping. Left to right is Kaleb, 2, (Alan & Eutemia's), Rhebeca,9, (Alan & Eutemia's), Kael,4, (Alan & Eutemia's), Tyler ,7,(Steve & Katie's), Jacob,3, (Kristi & Eric's), and Caden,3,(Steve & Katie's).

This is Isabella (8 months) and Alan, her Daddy
Kristi had hoped it would snow while she and Jacob were here and she got her wish plus a little more. Kristi took the kids sledding and carried Kaleb the whole time. I think Jacob is having a good time.

I haven't been online for a while because our daughter and our grandson stayed here for a few days. I loved having them and our grandson...Jacob... really made up with both of us. They left this morning and I feel so sad to see them go. I cried when then left and still could cry but am trying to keep myself busy and keep it off my mind.

I put myself out so much that by last night I couldn't go another inch. I felt badly that I didn't make it to my inlaws Christmas party. I tried real hard to push myself but I couldn't do it. I had a fever and my back and feet were in terrible shape so I stayed home and slept. I am still exhausted this moring but hopefully by the time Tyler comes here this afternoon I will have recouped a little bit!!

Okay...I've been tagged twice now and I guess I better get on the ball and respond to it. When a person is tagged they have to list 7 things about themselves and then tag 7 people. I have been tagged by:
Tricia at http://triciastreasures.blogspot.com/
Willa at http://www.scrapbook.com/myplace/index.php?mod=blogs&u=126195

7 things about me:

1. I love Starbucks. My newest favorite drink there is the Chai tea latte with low fat milk. It is fairly lowfat and tastes delicious:)

2. I have always loved horses. When I was a little girl I would go to sleep at night dreaming of owning a horse until one day my Grandpa bought me one. I don't own one now because of health but loved owning them in the past.

3. My favorite TV show is American Idol. I am so excited that another season is starting in Janurary!

4. I am left handed and do everything with my left hand except bowling.

5. I used to love to read until this illness hit me...now I'm thinking about getting some books on tape...does the library carry them? They're expensive.

6. I have always loved sweets but it's even worse ...like them even more...since I haven't felt well.

7. I love the water...lakes/ponds, the ocean. I think it is so soothing to be by the water.

I don't know 7 people to tag so I'm probably wimping out but anyone I go to and try to tag has been tagged all ready and it's like...how many times does a person want to be tagged? So, it ws fun to be tagged and I enoyed reading my friends list of 7 things about them that I didn't all ready know!

Latest layout done for the design team. I just love this picture of Kristi (our daughter) and Eric's little guy, Jacob. In fact, Jacob is flying in an airplane as I type this to come and visit and I'm really excited to see him and his Mom. Isn't this look one of just pure joy of living?

Tomorrow (Friday) we have an appointment at Olan Mills to have all 7 of our grandkids picture taken. That ought to be quite a hoot. Can't wait to see what they're able to come up with.

I haven't had a very good day today. I don't know if I'm extremely tired or what. One thing is I have a toothache on the area where the dentist was going to work on 2 weeks ago. I am so glad the tooth started hurting today because the dentist isn't in the office on Friday's. He won't be in till Monday morning and if the tooth gets any worse I will have to use the pain medicine he gave me. He wanted to give me vicodin but I told them that I take vicodin every day and it won't cut it for a toothache. I told them I would probably need percoset and that's what he did!! It's good to have it just in case that toothache gets to screaming:). My appointment to have this tooth worked on is the middle of January and that seems like a long ways off when a tooth is screaming in pain.

I always buy the "girls" (Kristi, Katie and Eutemia) something from
Bath & Body Works. I told Katie that I would like her help this year. It's nice to have someone of
that age group to help pick out what they would like. So, she picked me up this afternoon and she took me to the store. Caden came along and I took my walker that has a seat on it. He loved the walker and I pushed him on the little seat on the walker unless I needed to sit down. He was pretty slow in giving it back to me but eventually he would get off and let me sit for a little bit. It was a lifesaver today and I need to take it with me more often.

This is the layout I finished Sunday for one of my projects for the Design Team. I had to use the brown paper in some way. I couldn't stand to use all brown so added some of the orange paper with it. This is a picture of Beca being a "bride" when they lived in Greenwood. She was about 4 years old.

The weekend has turned into quite the interesting days. I'll try to shorten they acocunt as much as possible.



One Friday Wayne said he'd take the day off work and take me to the hospital to see my Dad. Katie called and said she was working and needed us to take care of Tyler. I thought that would be fine and he'd like seeing his Great Grandpa Dick. We picked him up at school at 12:2o because they had a half day. Tyler was a little disappointed that we were heading to South Bend right away but seemed to accept it okay. As we got closer to the hospital he got a little angry acting. We had played a game of travel battleship and my pegs spilled all over his lap and that was very upsetting to him. The rest of the trip he seemed to be angry with me for some reason. When we got to the hospital he refused to go inside. I still didn't realize what was going on with him. Wayne dropped me off at the front door so I could get a wheel chair for him to push me upstairs. It took the longest time and they hadn't come in. Wayne finally called me and said Tyler was refusing to go into the hospital. A long time later I see Wayne carrying a crying Tyler into the hospital. I realized at the moment that he was scared to come in. I forget sometimes that he's only 7 years old and doesn't have the life experiences to make him mature. He's so smart that it seems he at my level at times. We started up to the room and he was still crying. We told him he didn't have to go into the room and that seemed to be a little better for him. I went in to see my Dad and Wayne and Tyler went to the lounge where they found my Mom. I told my Dad about Tyler and he said not to stay...to leave since he was scared...he understood. Even on all the pain medicine he understood Tyler's feelings which I was thankful for. I went to the waiting room and let Wayne see my Dad and then we took off.



Wayne had to fix a crane while we were out. Tyler wasn't too thrilled until he found out they had video games. Wayne gave him huge handfuls of quarters to play the games As soon as we left the hospital he was fine and seemed so happy. It was pure fear that made him act the way he did. I've never seen anything as cute as him playing those games. He kept talking to himself .....even when he was playing the games. I was happy too because I had taken some scrapbook magazine to look through.



After that I had to stop by University Park Mall. I had called the Gap and they had a hat, scarf and mittens for Kael that I wanted so I needed to I pick those up. There's no quick way to get to the Gap so I had to walk quite a ways. I made it to the Gap okay although I was sweating like mad and my hair was even getting wet. It was after I left the Gap that my back pain began and I didn't know how I was going to get out of the mall. I remembered all those times I had spent hours there walking the whole length of the place. I wouldn't be doing that again. Back to today...(actually Friday). I had to stop and rest 2-3 times to make it out to the car. I even felt like I was going to pass out. By that time the sweat was dripping off me onto my blouse, hair and the floor. It is so embarassing. I finally got the strength to make it to the car. Wayne couldn't believe how awful I looked. I was upset physically and emotionally upset that I couldn't do a simple task like that.



Saturday morning I woke up with horrific muscle spasms. I have noticed that they come after I have had a big day the day before. I took a muscle relaxer right away but it took just over an hour for it to help. You can't believe how slow that hour goes when you're in so much pain. I did nothing the rest of the day. My aunt has given me magnets to sleep to prevent the spasms but I haven't found a way to keep them on. I need to get an elastic band with pockets in it. I will try to find one online today.

The rest of Saturday was spent doing very sendentary projects. I worked on a layout due this week for the design team. It is the one at the top of this post.



I woke up with muscle spasms again Sunday morning. I had taken a muscle relaxer when i went to bed Saturday night so thank goodness the spasms weren't as severe and didn't last as long as Saturday morning.



I can't believe it but Sunday was our 35th wedding anniversary. We were both teenagers when we got married so I'm sure many people didn't think we would make it. They didn't know how much we loved each other:) I am unable to travel so a trip for our anniversary is out of the question. I had wanted to go to Red Lobster for lunch and then to a movie but after the day I had on Saturday I didn't feel like going. Wayne is so understanding of my abilities and disabilities and was fine staying home with me. We went to WalMart together and just enjoyed each others company. We got a carry-out from Christo's for our anniversary dinner and after being out so long my back was hurting so I sat in my most comfortable chair which is the computer chair. We ate in different rooms so I could get my back under control. We both understand that this is the way it is. Would I like to change it? Sure I would but I know I can't right now. Even though I'm crying as I type this I am usually very accepting of my situation. Things could be worse and I'm so happy for the abilities that I do have!

Tuesday I went in for a pump refill. I hadn't felt well ever since I stopped the anti-biotic and when they took my vitals before the pump refill I had a fever. It wasn't high but was lowgrade at 99.7 ....so I called my family doctor today and asked if he would call in another round of the anit-biotics. He said he wanted to see me. He examined my legs (where the cellulitis is) real well and said my legs are still hot to the touch meaning the cellulitis is still there. He wrote me a script for another round of anti-biotics. I could tell he really felt bad for me..and it's so nice to have a doctor who really cares. I don't know if it's because we were neighbors when I felt well and now he sees the change in my abilitites, etc...or maybe he might just like me as a person:)

Right before I went to my doctor appointment I went to pick Tyler up from school. I get there early so I can be in the front of the line. Well, I kept falling asleep...now I know it's probably from the infection in my body but I just couldn't stay awake. I called and told Wayne and he called Katie who came right over and picked us both up. I have always said I won't drive with any of the grandkids in the car if I don't feel sharp enough to drive. I won't risk their lives. Tyler was so excited to see me and then when he saw his Mom in the car he couldn't figure out what was going on. We drove over to Starbucks and then she took me home for the hour before my doctor appt.

After the appointment I told Katie that I thought I could drive home. I got out of the car which was parked at the school and it was a sheet of ice. My first foot out of the car went sliding and I ended up flat on my face and halfway under Katie's car. It really shook me up for a while and I know it did her too. She came running out of the car to see if she could help me up.

Today (Thursday) is my Dad's surgery. He has kidney cancer and he will have one of his kidney's removed today. I felt so sorry for him yesterday because he couldn't have anything to eat all day Wednesday and then to top it off he had to drink that horrid stuff to make you go to the bathroom and have an enema too. What a horrible day it must have been for him and to have the antcipation of the surgery on top of it. I called him Wednesday night to let him know that I would be praying for him. He changed the subject and told me that the slippers I got him on Tuesday night fit him perfect. I was so glad I could do anything to make things a little more pleasant for him. He is determined he will be hom on Saturday even though the doctor said he'd be in for 5 days. He loves his home and is comfortable there ...I hope that if he still feels that way after the surgery that the doctor will listen to him.

I joined a new group at http://www.scrapbook.com I am setting up a page there and will put a link to it when I'm done with the page. There are just hundreds of scrapbookers on that site that you can talk to or make friends with that have the same passion for scrapbooking. I've enjoyed looking around the site. I think I could spend days there looking around.

Below is Isabella's Christmas present this year. It is from Gymboree...one of my favorite kids stores. This outfit isn't a bit practical but I thought it was SO cute and I emailed it to her mother before I bought it and got her approval and she loved it too. At 8 months old I figure Bella won't need much in the line of toys this year because she won't know any difference. There is a long sleeved shirt underneath the sweater that has the word ballerina on it. The tights have ink lacing that look like they were the ballerina tights laced up. How cute! (in my opinion)

This is my lastest layout. It's been rather "messy" getting my layouts done the last couple of weeks because I'm rearranging my scrapbook room. I am purging everything I haven't been using and I think it will be easier to find things if I have less. I love this picture because when I first printed it I thought there was something wrong with it because of the big black speck on the bottom. Then I saw all 3 boys looking at the black speck and realized it was a bug and saw that Beca had no interest in the bug at all but all 3 boys sure did!

We have had a peaceful weekend. It's nice to have been married so many years that we now enjoy being quiet and doing nothing. It might be our age or maybe my illness that makes me a little less active. I really think it's the illness because before that I was active every minute of my day and fell into bed exhausted at night.

Friday afternoon Wayne and I both felt like we were getting the flu. I had a fever and chills and was nauseated and Wayne was achy all over and had diahrrea but we were supposed to watch Tyler for the night. I thought maybe he could stay with my parents and be all right but he called me around 5:30 and wondered when he could come over. I told him to give us an hour and we'd sleep and hopefully be feeling better. Well, I thought he had hung up the phone but he thought I had hung up on him. I would never do that no matter how sick I was. My MOm called about 40 minutes later and said he hadn't stopped crying so I told her I was on my way to get him. He gave me the biggest hug when I got there and I appologized to him and he seemed just fine then...he jumped in my car and we were off. I still felt sick when we got home and told him he could play games on the computer and there is a bed in that room and I would lay down and rest. He was fine with that. The amazing thing is that when I woke up I felt fine and felt much better the rest of the evening. He and the 7 webkins slept with Wayne and about crowded him out of the bed:)

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This is Alan, Kristi and Katie when they were younger. In case you don't know them...they are our (Wayne and me) children. It almost brings tears to my eyes to see this picture. It seems like yesterday that they were this age and yet it's been years. I loved being a mother...not that I'm not now but a mother to this age of child. In this picture they were in my parents barn waiting for a pony to be delieverd...what an exciting day that was!!

I was headed back to the computer with a hand full of fairly healthy pretzels and Wayne called and said I've got something for you if you'd come to the door. He had a little package of Krispy Kreme donut holes. There goes my healthy snack..ha ha!!Of course, I could choose the pretzels but not with the Krispy Kreme in my hand!

I sometimes feel so pathetic but last night was the design team meeting and I get so excited when there's a meeting. It's my chance to get out and be with other women with a similar interest and it sure does my psyche a world of good!

Tyler will be spending the night here tonight. His Mom & Dad have a wedding to attend in Indianapolis and it's a treat to be able to have him here for the night. He told us yesterday that his bed time is 7:30 but on the weekends he gets to stay up really late. We asked him how late that was and he said it's 8:00. I got so tickled by that. I was thinking maybe 11:00 or later...but I think I can make it to 8:00.

I'm going to try to get a different look on my blog and put some music on it. I don't know if I'll be successful with the music...if you dond't hear any it means I need to work on it a little longer:)

For about 2, maybe 3 years we haven't put up a tree. It just seems like a huge ordeal. So, this year I bought a 3 foot tree to put on our little foyer table and decorated it in blue and silver. The lights don't look as blue as they really are but it's such a pretty little tree. I was able to use another function on my camera taking this picture. It's fun finding out new things on it all the time. I've only had a about a year now:)

Wayne and I had a nice day today just relaxing and not going anywhere. I tried to get my layout done that's due this week for the design team. It was using a tool that demonstrated it. I had it all planned on what I would do and what picture I would use. Well, it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I asked Wayne if he would do it for me and he had a terrible time and couldn't do it either. So, I gave up my first idea and settled with a much simpler idea. I will post it when I finish the layout. I should get it done tomorrow some time.

Katie and Steve took her boys to cut down their Christmas tree today. Santa Claus was there and Katie said that their 3 year old, Caden, ran right up to Santa and sat on his lap. Katie was kind of embarrassed by his repsonse of what he wants. He said he wants p.j.'s and food.. How halarious!!

That's all for today...except to say that S unday night is my worst time of the week. Wayne's bbeen home all weekend and on Monday I know he will be starting another work week. I also know that tomorrow I will start another work week where I'll be home lonely again. At least this week will be a design team meeting!!

He's 7!!!!!!!!

What a big deal it is to turn from 6 to 7. I remember how slowly time seemed to move when I was that age. So, even more so it's a big deal to have a birthday. It's sure been a fun 7 years getting to know and love and cherish this little boy. We are thankful for his little life and for the chance to live close to him and get to be a part of his life.

So, in your favorite color, Tyler

Happy Birthday and many many more!!!!!!!!!!

After eating my fill of turkey, dressing and sweet potato casserole I always go "play" with the kids. It's fun to watch them play (and referee, if needed) and see what pretend game they are playing. Tonight it was Beca instructing everyone on how to exit in case of a fire...only thing is they all caught on pretend fire on the way out. Before all the fire games started though Caden ran to his Mom & Dad's desk and pulled out his Dad's guitar and started singing a made up song to me. I thought it was so sweet. You can see him singing in the picture.

Tyler had to show me his muscles yesterday and took the shirt off his arms so I could see how his muscles move when he flexes his arms. (so cute!!) Better watch out for that one in a dark alley:)


Our daughter and son-in-law had us over to their house for thanksgiving dinner. We all brought some dishes to help her out a little bit and everything was wonderful!! My Mom does the best turkey and does well keeping it nice and moist. Wayne and I made a salad and sweet potato casserole. It was so nice too that my brother and his wife and son made it here this year. She has been battling breast cancer and is doing much better this year than last.

For being in so much pain all the time I usually am able to stay pretty positive. But, the last 2 days have been difficult for me. I've been crying off and on all evening and don't quite know how to pull myself out of this! Wayne goes to bed so early that I"m here by myself all evening...that alone gets depressing. I would appreciate your prayers:)

I just love these pictures of Bella. They are on her Mom's website trying to help sell the Coach headbands her Mom makes. The baby ought to sell hundreds of them alone:) Isn't she a little doll? She started crawling at 6 months and now at almost 7months she is crawling all over the house. The unusual thing is that her sister came here to the USA from Brazil at 9 months old. She crawled with one knee and the other leg was her foot kind of running along...make sense? Bella crawls just like her big sister did.



I spent the day reorganizing my scrapbook room today. It need it so badly. I just couldn't find anything I was looking for. What a job!! I all ready have a good start towards next years used items sale. I figure if I haven't used it since we moved here that I'n not gonna use it.

I am fighting depression tonight. I don't get this way often. I try to keep my spirits high with continuing to do activities I enjoy. Last night I went with Katie and helped her while the 2 boys got their picture taken. I couldn't believe that poor little Tyler got an upset stomach because he got so nervous about the picture. He ended up really enjoying himself and the pictures we saw this afternoon were wonderful!! I can't wait to get mine (and start scrapbooking:)

Wayne worked another long Monday. He left the house around 6:00 and got home around 6:00. I try not to let his long hours bother me but the lonliness sometimes is overwhelming:(
I don't know quite how to work through this or maybe I can't! Lonliness is lonliness. I usually have Tyler in the afternoons and today his Mom didn't work so I didn't need to pick him up.
Oh well, now I'm rambling.

Wayne stayed home and didn't go to work yesterday. We had a 1:00 appointment and flu shots at 2:00.
After that I did a little Christmas shopping for the grandkids. Wayne couldn't believe that I could stay in WalMart for 2 hours. Well, men just don't understand how long it takes to look, think, put it in your cart, go back and take it out of your cart and then go and check out and wait in line. Anyway, I got a good start on the grandkids Christmas and that is the hardest part. I would like to save shipping if I can and buy it locally.

I've had a couple of unsettling things happen that I have to keep a positive attitude if at all possible. One day last week I drove to WalMart to do some grocery shopping. I was looking at the toys trying to get some ideas while I was there. I kept falling asleep and the toy I had in my had would fall to the floor. I was there by myself and knew I had no business being on the road when I'm like that. It's not fair to other people or to myself. I called Wayne and asked him what to do so he called his parents and they came and picked me up. One of them drove their car to my house and the other drove my car. He is close to 80 and she's a few years younger and it shouldn't be them helping me...I should be helping them. I DO appreciate their help though!

I have more to say but keep falling asleep:)
As usual, please overlook any typos:)

r

Above is a layout I did for the design team. I am applying again to be on the team for the next year and they asked that we do a bio page this was SO hard for me to figure out and for me to do. I hate pictures of myself and I also don't like to talk about myself...but I did it:)

I've been having trouble sleeping. The night before last I took a sleeping pill and I sleep walked. Every time I sleep walk I end up in the kitchen trying to do some kind of cooking. Many times I've gotten out bread or poured some cereal and just left it there. So, even though I take a sleeping pill it is a very restless sleep. I didn't take a sleeping pill last night and slept all night in my chair at the computer. I think every time I think of getting in bed I realize that I might get muscle spasms so I wait and the last few nights I don't end up in bed at all which makes me really tired the next day. Such is the life...the fun life of someone with chronic back/feet pain.

These pictures are Tyler with the webkinz. Someone had a great idea with these webkinz. They come with their own special number that you enter on their website. They come with their own room and enough money to decorate the room. There are lots of choices when it comes to decorations and clothes to dress the webkinz in. You play lots of different games, answer questions and take quizzes to earn more "kinzcash". You have to feed your pet and get it lots of rest. They can get sick and if they do you take them to the doctor. It's a whole world of its own. There is something about this that kind of sucks you in:) You see how many pets we have? I have trouble saying no when the grandkids ask for another pet...and they know how to press my buttons to get one too...like the pouting lip and the disapponted look:(



I got news today that Molly is home. That is good news!! From what I gather when they did her cath. of her heart they accidently punctured an artery. She started bleeding inside and no one figured it out until this young doctor came in her room at 3am and figured it out and applied pressure to that vein and got it to clot and stop bleeding. Molly, if you're reading this...I was really worried about you along with many others. So glad to hear you're home.

My Dad will be going in within the next few days to have his cancerous kidney removed. He will be in the hospital for 5 days. With the short stays anymore that's a long time. I hope and pray that this will take care of the problem and he will be here for many more years. He's an important part of our family...like the firm or strong foundation.

Wayne had an interview with Namco last night in Merrillville. He pretty much has his choice of where we could go. The one that sounded best to both of us is Indianapolis. He would be the regional director of Indianapolis, Terre, Haute and Louisville. He would be gone for 2 nights a week. They would pay for us to move to Indy. It's really a hard choice to make. If I would end up getting disability then we would be better off staying here. So, we have a big decision to make in the next few days.

My latest layout!!

It's been a full week and I'm really tired tonight. That's quite unusual for me because I don't usually get tired till about 2:00 in the morning.

Take a look at Tyler's boots (the pirate) in my previous post. I made those for him. He was so excited about his boots until he saw them. He was totally disappointed with them. I know he was expecting real boots with a sole and he got these strange looking boots that would fit over his shoes. By the time he put them on he saw the look and loved them. That's when a grandma is proud of her work and the 6-8 hours spent making them is worth it!
We have been We've been watching "The Great American Band" because there's a young man on there that we knew from our church. It is especially fun because he came with me to one of my concerts when I was singing and I had him sing a song by himself. He loved it and was a natural. I think he was like a Sophomore in high school at the time he came. He went to a music school in Nashville (I forget the name right now) and started his own band and they are AWESOME. Their name is Denver and the Mile High Orchestra. I hope they continue to do well!!


Every once in a while I hear about someone who thinks they have been healed. They give God the glory claiming him to have have heard prayers on their behalf and to have intervened in their life and healed them. That always brings questions to me ...The first one, of course is why haven't I been healed? I've had prayers on my behalf for years. Along with myself are people like my doctor's first wife, Jane who had 2 young children and another young man with 4 children who has MS, and is unable to function and take care of himself. If anyone was to be healed, it would them and yet Jane passed away and Mike continues to suffer the effects of MS..being no more than a vegetable unable to even communicate with anyone.

I'll step down off my soapbox:) This last week I picked up Tyler from school on Tuesday. It was a really cold day and we were getting some occasional snowflakes coming down. I needed to go to the scrapbook store for a couple items and surprisingly enough he waned to go too. He had an agenda and that was to check out the children's design team that they will be having for children soon. While we were there he was playing in the children's play area when he heard a customer come in and say it's snowing outside. He came over by me and was SO excited. He said...Can I go outside and see if there's enough snow to make a snowball? I told him to stay on the sidewalk and it would be fine. The funny and cute part about it is that it was only spitting snow and with a chilld'a innocence he really thought he thought he could make that snowball!

My cousin Molly who is just in her early 30's went to Northwestern Hospital in Chicago for a heart catheritiztion. (sp?) I found out today that it didn't go well. She started bleeding and they couldn't get it stopped. That was yesterday and she is now in intensive care and has had several blood transfusions. Please pray with me for her to be all right. I guess they found out that it's not her heart that causing trouble but her lung. I don't know if that's good news or bad news...let's hope it's good!!

Forgive any typos today...I've fallen asleep while typing this about 10 times:) Guess it's time to go to to bed.

Sleep well!!!

Happy Halloween!! (and Beca's birthday...I'm 9!)






Each day has it's own challenge. Living life itself brings an adventure of its own and it seems we don't get to pick our challenges. I wish we did cause they'd sure be different than the challenges I've to work with. I get so frustrated with dealing with pain every day...grrr:) When I pictured my life at this stage of life I thought I'd be this "hip" grandma that was active and my grandkids and I would have all kinds of fun adventures. Well, we have adventures but they're of a different nature than what I pictured. Nothing can compare with picking Tyler up from school and seeing the glow in his eyes when he sees that I'm there to pick him up. He always runs to me with a great big hug.

We got the bad news this week that my Dad has kidney cancer. Things look positive so far that it's just contained in the one kidney. He's doing lots of tests this week to try to see just what he's dealing with for sure. He will have surgery soon to have the kidney removed. He may also have to have chemotherapy. Time and tests will tell. We would appreciate your prayers for him.

It's currently 3:10 and I woke up with muscle spasms in my my low back. There's no way I can go back to sleep until the spasms let up. It should be anytime now because I took the muscle relaxer about a half hour ago.

Beca was here a week or so ago and stood looking at my "photo table". It's a long kind of skinny table that's only purpose is to keep the grandkids pictures on. She thought hers was really out of date and I agreed with her. We both decided to go out in the back yard..natural light and do a photo shoot. These pictures were the result. She's such a natural in front of the camera.



Wayne and I have both been so sick this week with what I'd call either the flu or a bad cold. It really got us both down. We ended up getting antibiotics 2 days ago and are starting to feel just a little bit better. I still ran a fever all day yesterday and he hasn't been to work since Monday when he put in 14 1/2 hours and came home sick and exhausted. But, what a blessing that he did that and we got the money banked and he could just be sick and sleep and take it easy the rest of this week. I have alwasys said that it's a treat when you're sick to be able to just BE sick and not have to go to work or take care of little kids...which I did for many years and I'm sure many others can identify with that. He talked about going to Angola today but we'll see. It's unusual that he's not up at 7:30 am so he's probably feeling a little "punk" as he calls it yet.

Katie called me Sunday afternoon and asked me if I had any ideas for Tyler's party at school. I said..yes, I do. When I was at the design team crop Friday night I saw several of the ladies using a new die cutting machine and making the cutest little bags to take treats in for the "Fall Parties" (which used to be able to be Halloween parties). I had an hour before the scrapbook store closed and ran over there right away and we were able to get just the right amount of bags made with the last of the Halloween paper I liked so well. She went home and put in the fake ugly teeth, a small yoyo, a sucker and some other candy. That morning when she took a shower Caden had a hayday with the bags. He opened all the suckers (that's 25 of them) and ate the M&M's out of about 6 of the bags. I called her yesterday to tell her that I was sorry I didn't make Caden a bag but that paper I used was that last of the paper. She said...don't worry, he's had his fun with the bags:)

I woke up with muscle spasms in my low back again this morning. They're not nearly as bad as a week ago and I took a muscle relaxer right away. My Aunt that lives in CA said she talked to her physical therapist about my muscle spasms and she suggested getting magnets to place under that area when I sleep. I have heard of that helping pain years ago and think I'll check into it. She had a couple of other suggestions but the magnet ideas seemed like the easiest way to begin. I need to find something to help because I hate waking up with these spasms:(

Last Friday night the design team got together at the scrapbook store and we all cropped together. I had a really good time and this picture was my only accomplishment. I have noticed that I'm a little slower than many of the ladies but I'm sure it's all the meds and the pain that slow me down because my nature has always been to be the fastest at everything I do. Thanks to Jennifer for helping me with this layout...I love it!!

I paid for all the fun Friday night because I woke up with horrific muscle spasms in my low back Saturday morning. It took an hour for the muscle relaxers to work and I can't begin to tell you how horrible that pain is. It seems I always have to pain for my fun:(


Today is Wayne's birthday. I totally forgot when I got up until I got on my computer and saw the date so I called him right away and sang to him. He is so carefree about what should happen on his birthday compared with me..his wife..who thinks I'm princess of the day:) and milk it for all it's worth. I guess that's one of the things I really love about him...his selflessness. He's been a good example through the years to watch and learn from.

I am also frustrated this morning. I have been fighting a cold and heaping that on everything else I just feel worthless. I have several pages to get done for the design team and a huge I mean HUGE pile of laundry to fold and put away. Wayne does the laundry and piles it all on the chair in the bedroom. My whole house is a mess and I really like it orderly. I need to unload the dishwasher and here I sit...not wanting to do a blessed thing. It's all ready ONE O'CLOCK!!! I will give myself a little bit...maybe another hour and then try to do one thing at a time.

I have myself pictured in my head as the person I was before all the health issues....and the weight gain. I'm trying to take a picture for the bio page I need to make for the new design team and every one I take I look so fat and sick and unlike the person I feel like inside. It just emphasizes all the changes I don't want to accept. I read email from family and friends and it seems like everyone's life gets to move on except for mine. I am stuck in this horrible pain and I look like crap and feel even worse. Sounds like a great bio, doesn't it? My house used to be so clean and neat and now I haven't been able to clean it for about 8 months or more. I clean the bathrooms and Wayne cleans the kitchen floor and sweeps and that's all that gets done. I guess men don't see dust but I do and when I try to dust the pain just gets too out of control...so I am stuck with a dusty and what seems to me a dirty house. I would love to go back to the house we had to sell because of medical expenses and have it clean like it used to be with everything in its place. That's really who I am:)

I went to the dentist yesterday because I lost a big hunk out of my tooth eating a pretzel. I almost had a panic attack when he was telling me what he's going to have to do and showing me the x-ray and seeing all the decay. The tooth that I lost the hunk out of has decay down to the bone and he is afraid he will have to cut out some of the bone. The one next to that has decay..the one next to that has decay under the crown and the last one has decay and needs a crown. So, his plan to save money and make it easier on me is to pull the tooth with the hunk missing out of it and make a bridge between all these teeth with a mere cost of....$3600. The only good thing is that I can be sedated while he does this...otherwise he wouldn't like how uptight I get when I have my teeth worked on. I saw a little girl in the dentist chair having her teeth worked on when I was walking out and she was doing so well. I had to tell myself I used to be that little girl but a lot has happened since then making me the person I am today.

That little house may look simple to make but believe me it's one of the hardest projects I've had to do for the Design Team. Wayne helped me and it took us all weekend to complete. Wayne's comment when we were done was...if we ever have to do another one we're hiring a contractor. I thought that was pretty funny!

Other than working on that nothing else is new. I thought in the middle of the night that I was catcing cold but after sleeping several hours and takin osme medicine I feel a little bit better. I hope it was just exhaustion from no sleep for 2 night. (Friday and Saturday) I think I was so worried about getting that houwse done that I was too woried to sleep.

Kaleb was so interested in the dandelions in our yard...and he had quite a few to choose from...so I had to make it a photo opportunity. Is it just me...his grandma? or is he absolutely adorable?




Tyler is so excited and proud to have a loose tooth. He even wanted me to take a picure of his loose tooth and usually he shuns the camera.





I haven't posted for a couple of days because I have been too sick. It was a lucky circumstance that helped me to figure out what was wrong. I was so sick to my stomach and had a headache for 2 days. I thought maybe it was related to the pump...but...Wayne had to leave really early yesterday to service our machines in the Toledo, Ohio area. He didn't want to wake me up to wrap my feet and legs but I had wishedhe had because I was in so much pain. So, I called the physical therapist and asked if she could just wrap my legs and she worked me in. As soon as she saw my legs she just stared at the for a while and then told me I had cellulitis again. She told me to call the doctor right away and get some antibiotics. I did just that as soon as I got in the car. I have now taken 3 pills and feel better all ready. The nausea is gone and I am feeling a little more energy all ready. Why did I get it again? Who knows but I'm sure glad to figure ou what was wrong.

I had an interesting day today. I didn't sleep well last night and fell asleep watching TV in the recliner. That made me wake up with th muscle spasms. The reason I didn't sleep well is that on our way home from my psychological testing I saw a Panera's. We hadn't eaten there for ages so Wayne was a good sport and stopped there so I could get some carryouts. We split the new chicen condora (or something close to that) tasted really good. It was a little rich but I still liked it. Well, it must have been richer than I thought because I burped about every 60 seconds all night long. I tried tums and they didn't help, tried Gas-X chewable and they didn't help. When I woke up, Wayne told me to take kaopectate and I couldn't believe it but it helped!

I went with Katie to run errands and had a great time even though we ran out of gas. We were right in the middle of an intersection when the car stopped but lucky that we were right in front of a gas station. I took charge of Caden and we went into the gas station and I got hom some Cheetos and by the time we paid for them the car truck was at the pump filling up!

That's my biggest excitement for the day. I was thankful when we had to walk to the gas station that I was having a good day since I had to walk to the gas station. It may not seem like a big deal to the normal picture but when I have to walk any little distance I panic knowing how painful it will be:)

This is a picture of a brain and my brain got a real workout today. I had no idea what I was getting into when I went for my neuro-psyche test. It took 3 hours!! It was interesting and it was difficult. I had to do things like math in my head which got harder and harder. He also read 10 words that were not at all connected and throughout the test I would have to repeat as many words as possible. I had to know what is in the current news and past history. I had to draw and had to remember tje drawings and repeat them again and again. That's just a general idea of what I had to do. It will be interesting when he calls my neurologist and tells him the interpretation of the test. I see the neurologist on Monday!

Tyler told this big story to my Mom and me on Monday when I picked him up from school. He said he and his friend Cam (I think that's the name) were both getting groups of very big boys together in two groups. They would each be in charge of their own team (or is it gang:) and they were gonna FIGHT!!!!
Rhebeca was in the car when he was telling this story and we all tried to tell him different ways to work out their differences but after each idea he said...nope, we're gonna fight. It was a real "boy" moment. Well, I think today was the day for the big fight so I called his Mom to see if he was still alive (...ha ha!!) and ask how the fight went. She said the fight didn't go down because they found a bull frog and played with that during recess. I laughed so hard.
Those tough little gangsters all liked playing with a frog instead of fighting. I just love this age. They are just precious.

Brrrr! It's cold in here!! Poor Wayne has to live with a cold house and sometimes he feels it...like tonight. He came home from work exhausted and feeling a little sick and I came home from the grocery store very overheated and in much pain. So, by the time I carried in the groceries and fixed some supper I was dripping with sweat and turned the temp down to 66. Wayne knows my saying is that he can bundle up an get warm but I have no way to get cool. I really feel bad when he gets cold like that but if I turned up the heat for him I would just be miserable.


I had a little more pain than I like to have today. Back pain and foot pain. My feet were worse today than they've been for a LONG time. I'm on that new medicine and it didnt help today. I hope tomorrow's better. Tomorrow I have a neuro-psyche test that the neurologist ordered. I can't imagine what the test will be like...I'll post here tomorrow what the test was like.

Becky

Beca's Photoshoot!
Beca was at our house this afternoon and noticed the picture of her in the frame was rather old....like a couple of years old. So, together, we decided to do a little photo shoot of our own. The lighting wasn't very good in the house because it was rainy outside so I had her go outside and stand on the porch and that's where I took these pictures. She came up with these expressions all by herself...no help from me:) I used a special mode on my camera called "shoot portrait focusing tightly on the subject" Now I know there's another name for this but that's what it says on my camera:)







I had a much better day today than I've had for quite some time. I actually had some energy which was wonderful. Didn't get much done except for a little housework and then like I normally do on Monday's I picked up Tyler from school. Soon after we got home my Mom stopped by and Beca was with her. Beca wanted to stay and since I hadn't seen her for a while I was thrilled to have her here.

I was disappointed with myself that I got a little nervous with both of them here. It made me feel like an old lady!

Well, after Tyler went home, Beca came to the store with Wayne and me and I sure enjoyed it. She looked at all the costumes and didn't find one that would be appropriate for her in her size. So, after the groceries we came to our house and she picked out her outfit online and her grandparents (Wayne and I) ordered it for her. I know she had mentioned several times that she didn't have an outfit yet and that's important when you're a young lady!! The name of the costume is "Pirate Cutie Costume". It's really cute.

While I got the groceries she started telling me how hungry she was. I gave Wayne my coin purse and he took her to the McDonald's attched to the WalMart and sat with her while she ate. I'm so glad that they got that time together. Sometimes Grandpa doesn't spend as much time as the Grandma does and I love Wayne enough and know what a special person he is that I want these grandchildren to know him in the same way. I know he loves them all too and never complains when I jump right in there and play with the kids and he stays in the background. Anyway, it ended up being a good time for for Grandpa/Granddaughter bonding.

That's all for now!!

Becky

This is my accomplishment for the day. I'm not sure I like it. I'll know for sure when I wake up and take a look at it,

I consider this still Sunday because it's just 12:25PM so it should count as posting every day like I had wanted to start doing.

I had a very interesting day today. I was truely purely exhasted all day today. It's no wonder though. Friday I woke up with muscle spasms and took muscle relaxers a couple of times Friday to settle down those muscles. That, of course, made me sleepy. Then, Sunday I was very nauseated and vomited and had to take a phenergan suppository. Those make me sleepy too. So, I slept almost all day today. I got one layout done and I don't even like it. I will proably tear it apart and redo it. It is the one posted on top here!

Kaleb on his new bike!



Isabella enjoying her first taste of ice cream...and she LOVED it!! She cried when it was taken away.


Picture of Isabella on Labor Day of this year. She's getting so big all ready...and what a cutie!!

Well, here I am into day #2 of my new plan to post every day. I woke up this morning with muscle spasms so I took a muscle relaxer. It helped but put me right to sleep in the one chair that causes the muscle spasms so when I woke up the 2nd time today I had the spasms again so I took another muscle relaxer. Can you say tired:) That's what I am....tired!!

I did pretty well all morning and then around 11:00 I got real nauseated and it's now 3:00 and am stil nausated. I've finally resigned myself to the fact that this is going to be a lousy day!

Not much else to say because it's making me sicker to type.

Becky

I got a new puppy this week. It's the one below...a pink poodle:) It is a webkinz dog and I care for it online. I play games with other people like checkers, rock paper and scissors, etc. to earn points and then I can buy things for my puppy. I've enjoyed it so far. And it hasn't wet on my carpet yet at all!!




This is Caden and Grandpa Wayne wrestling. Grandpa had to call it quits before he got hurt...Caden LOVED it!!

This is Caden showing me his muscles. He thinks he's pretty big:)



I have made a new committment with myself to try to keep up on this blog better than I have in the last couple of months. It is so healing for me to write my feelings about my health and when I don't I suffer more depression.

I praise God for my pain doctor and that he prescribed a new medication for my feet. It keeps me almost 90% painfree in my feet. I still can't wear shoes without my feet burning but that is nothing compared with being in constant pain. I have read that the feet has more nerve endings than anywhere else in the body and I tend to really believe it!

The picture below was taken on Labor Day 2007. Labor Day this year was on Sept. 3rd which was Rhebeca's 9th birthday. We all got together in Culver by the lake to celebrate Rhebeca and Kael's birthday's. Beca, as I said, was 9 and Kael is 4 years old. I'm very thankful for their presence in my life. They both bring me so much joy!!


I haven't posted for a while because I have been plagued with depression...not bad but enough that I don't want to be negative on this blog. Every once in a while it hits me how disabled I really am. Our son was looking at a job in Oregon and it just crushed me. I knew I cannot fly and cannot sleep in a hotel bed. So, I would be unable to visit them. I had a hard time working myself out of that. I tried to explain to him how I felt but unless you experience my disabilities it's very hard to understand the confinement of them. Unless things change for me we will not be able to travel anymore. I have tried to be thankful for the amount of travel I've been able to do up to this point. Wayne and I were able to do a LOT of traveling in connection to the business. We really enjoyed the many places we were able to go and experience. I am trying to look back on memories and enjoy them and look forward with anticipation for a wonderful future with a family that loves each other.

Our granddaughter was upset about a week ago. One of the family members had said something that upset her. I told her that there are about 20 of us total in this family and there is no way that 20 people are going to agree with each other in any given moment. But, being a family we must overlook and forgive the shortcomings of the other person and continue on in love. That's what a family does!That's a paraphrase but I have thought about my own words of wisdom many times in the years of raising children and living in the same town as our parents. We are all so different but we have somehow managed to remain friends!