Thursday, April 10, 2008

I've had a rough week so far this week. I just have no energy and sleep all day long. There are things I want to get done but everything...even scrapbooking...seems like it would take too much effort. I am beginning to wonder if I'm not a little bit depressed. I see myself going downhill as far as my health goes and it's really hard to face. I think what started to make me look at this is that my drivers license is expired and I looked at my picture from 5 years ago and what a change!! I can see what a huge change in health I've taken in the last 5 years. I worry that if the next 5 years is that drastic what I'll be like. But.....I am trying to take this just one day at a time. Some days I'm successful at it and others I'm not.

I am thankful for so many things though. Wayne has stuck by me through everything. He calls me several times a day and really cares how I feel. My mother has been blessed with better health and is able to help somewhat. Right now she's busy with our son's family and helping our son's wife but if I would need her I'm sure she'd be here. Our children are all very respectful of me and of my limitations. I know they'd like Mom to be like she used to be and so would Mom like to be there but life doesn't always give us what we want. God doesn't always answer our prayers. Let me rephrase that....God doesn't always give us what we ask for. I have tried hard to figure out why this would be given as my cross to bear and I always come up short of an answer. I've always tried to please others and God and even spent many years traveling around the area giving concerts for just pennies.


Anonymous said...

You are sooo blessed to have a husband and family like you do.God answers our prayers in very strange and subtle ways, but I do know that he answers them.(not always on our terms of course) I read your blogs and sometimes feel your pain and wish only the best health for you in the next 5 years. I absolutely admire your scrapbooking skills. That's one of the subtle ways you are being blessed. It takes away from your daily pain i imagine. Please have a good week-pain free. Sincerely, one of your blog readers
ps. I like David Archuleta too.I hope he wins the whole thing.

Kelly C. said...

I am getting caught up on your blog today and am sad to hear what you are saying. Please keep strong in your faith and know others like myself pray for you too! You have so much to give and share with your family, with your friends, and with your hobby Continue to stay strong, pray and know your friends are here for you too!
{{{BIG HUG}}} sent to you right now and come back and get it any time you need it!
Thinking of you, girly! ;)